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Saturday, August 13, 2005

Getting it all done


Ok, so the first week of kindergarten is over at our house. Let me reflect on how I feel. Tired, mentally and physically. Let's start on Monday. I am so pumped to start our first week of Home School. I am up at 6:30 a.m. and out the door to jog. I am feeling good, I have got my mini ipod pumping the praise music and my last thought as I enter the house at 7:30 from my glorious morning run is,"The ONLY goal for my day, for my week -Glorify God in everything I do." Simple, keepin it simple. Get in the house and things are going smoothly but I begin to stress. See, so moms sew Halloween costumes, some moms smock, I make elaborate birthday invitations. Our #3 is about to turn two and I designed this complicated and extremely cute, I must say, invitation and I had to get it out that day. I needed to get pictures developed, haven't done that since last December!, so we head out to Wolf for the one hour turn around. While we wait we waste time in Big Lots, this is a big decision for me, see I am always pondering how to best utilize my time. Well, I couldn't come up with a productive way to spend our time so we head to Big Lots, why I have no clue! SO anyways, there is a point to this story and I will get to it eventually, The kids are every where in the store, especially # 3. #2 is constantly whining and #1 he is bossing and stressing I am going to leave the girls behind. (He is already over protective) Finally I had had enough. Last week we spent a lot of time running around trying to find school supplies and I hate shopping with #3 right now. I just can't focus on anything when she is out with me. Ok here is the climax, we get back in the car and #2 starts whining about going and getting the pictures and she & #1 keep arguing and I start to doubt everything, should I send them to school, is this the right thing, can we all really tolerate each other this much, then I loose it and go off. I park to car and turn around to face them. I begin with #2 and tell, (yell) to her just how much I can't stand her whining. Then I move to #1, who is crying like a scared little boy, then I see #2 smirking and trying her hardest not to laugh at me. Ok, that really did me in, needless to say I had words with ALL of them. Then I sat in the car, which was blissfully quiet and began to realize just how far from my goal of the day I was. How did I get to this. My cell phone battery was dead, and I just kept thinking, if I could just throw this thing across the parking lot a few times I would feel so much better. But I didn't I drove about 20 feet, stopped to car again, yes I am still in the parking lot, and God provided me the strength and the words to beginning healing all of us right then and there. I was calm and became full of peace, and was able to express that I had valid frustrations and I needed them to realize it, also I needed to create stronger consequences to help enforce that some of those behaviors cannot be tolerated. Then I began with #2 and told her all the special things I loved and adored about her, she began to beam like she was winning a beauty pageant. She was just glowing, no kidding, I mean glowing! Then I shared some love with #1 and he got teary eyed, and of course #3 got her special fair share, and she just asked to look at another book. Then I drove about 10 more feet, stopped to car again and turned around to face them and say I was sorry. "Father God thank you for forgiving me, always, It amazes me that you can conditionally love me with all my faults and stupid ways. I know I am blessed, and those blessings have a purpose which is the same as the burden on my heart, I want to be completely used by you to bring glory honor and praise to your worthy NAME! May all that I have and all that I do be for you. Thank you for using me to accomplish your task. Thank you for each child we are blessed with. Thank you for complimenting me with my man, he is so much more than I ever deserved. "

Please excuse me, this is my first blog ever. My man has been encouraging me to do this for some time. I hope that other home school moms might find this. We began #1 in kindergarten this week. He is home schooled and we are using the Weaver Curriculum Volume One. LOVE IT! The first day # 1 pretended he and #2 we orphans. He had just put his baby sister down for a nap (We only begin Home School once she is asleep) He named me Ms. Mommy and asked if we'd adopt them, of course I said yes. It was an incredible day. Day two: #1 came up with the idea we were in Secret Spy Agent School, he cracked me up all day long! What a character. He had already memorized his memory verse, I was shocked - Gn. 1:31. #2 Has been keeping up with us. Every now and then I loose her as she drifts off to color color land. That child would color all day long! I love how artistic she is.

So here is it Friday, I got up 4 of the 5 mornings to exercise, dreading it each time but loving life once I was out to door. The fresh air, the sky, all the trees, it makes me come alive! I honestly do feel a bit overwhelmed, infact my man's shoulder got wet by a little break down from me once he got home. It is hard keeping the house somewhat clean and straight, cooking, teaching, paying bills, researching, planning, running errands, I know it sounds like I am whining now, but I am not, am I ? Bottom line-I am just going to keep on keepin on, I know who is in charge I know what he wants me to do, and he will accomplish it through me and long as I stay willing.

Ok, ok , Ok, enough. Good night!

2 Comments:

Blogger Justabeachkat said...

I love it! What a great idea. A way to make a journal and put down your true feelings. How wonderful that must feel. Maybe I need a Blog! Maybe I'll try this too.

I love you girl! You make me so proud of you. "Your man" (aka my baby) is soooooooo lucky.
I love you.

6:25 PM

 
Blogger terrible speller said...

Wow, what a sweet friend/mom-inlaw!!

8:51 PM

 

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