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Tuesday, July 25, 2006

hadn't felt much like writing

Don't know whether it is proper for me to say, writing or typing, which ever it is, I haven't been in the mood. I am not grumpy, just needed a break.

Well, my weekend with my mom was wonderful. We stayed in a cabin on the mountain campus of my old alma mater. I would sit here and try to describe what it feels like to be there, but there just isn't any way. All I can say is, it is one HUGE slice of HEAVEN. I really got a lot of planning for school accomplished.

We got back on Sunday and immediately I went to visit my friend who is moving to Colorado. It was the last time I would see her for at least a year. It was more emotional for me than I thought.

Monday, we began school. I will get back to that. BUT the big sad thing is my man left for China. He'll be gone just over a week. It was so tough to say goodbye. Yesterday was my mom's birthday, happy birthday mom!, and we went out to eat and this wonderful Italian place. I was miserable I got so full.

So, I stayed up too late last night, cause I couldn't keep my mind off my man. Woke up this morning and felt honestly depressed. I felt like a part of me was missing. The kids and I started school. I felt like I was putting on this brave face, but I was struggling to make it believable. Then I decided we just needed to get out of the house. So we ran some errands and on the way to the library I was on my cell phone with my mom, next thing you know, I broke down. Not the car, me. I was sobbing. The kids are like .... mommy are you okay? I could barely get out the words ... I just miss your my man. I mean he's been out of town many times before, but I guess just half way around the world is just different. I did hear from him once he landed. I cried again, and then I got my composure, didn't want to freak him out too bad, and said our I love you's and goodbye. I do feel better now that we have spoken, but I can still feel the emotion swelling every now and then. So, tomorrow I am taking the kids to see Co-Co. She's my college roommate and best friend, like a true sister. I am looking forward to getting away.

Now, I want to get my thoughts out about the upcoming new homeschool year. I am continuing with Weaver, even though I REALLY want to check out Konos, I thought I give what I have another try. After two days, I think #1 might get bored with it. The kid loves science. (Takes after his mama!) He begs me to do science. I ordered and microscope today from ebay for $1.99, seriously, only $1.99 and it's not a cheapy brand either. I CAN'T wait for it to come in. Okay on with my random thoughts. Yesterday the start up of school was going really well. Then while I was reading just with #1 things got ugly. The girls could not stand it that he was receiving one on one time with me. #2 had two melt downs and some other jealous behavior. Every mood she threw at me had me believing she was experiencing 4 year old PMS. Oh, and then #3 has mastered the skill of making sure she is in the clear when mama is mad at one of her siblings. Just when I am done with my ... you better stop/straighten up speech, she looks at me and says, "Mommy, I weally wuv you" It makes me giggle inside. But today went MUCH better. I am still toying with the idea of unschooling #1. #2 is so different. She would love to sit and do workbook sheets ALL day long. I am going to keep with the program for a one, no okay, let's say two months and re-evaluate then. Who knows, I am always changing my mind.

Okay, so I think I am up to date. Uh...no. One more thing I want to "type" about that I want to remember forever. Tonight we all watched my favorite all time Disney movie ... The Little Mermaid. OH, I just love it. Today, #2 was singing Ariel's song in the car, and I just knew I had to watch it. Something that #2 loves to do is to play mermaid in the pool with me. We sing one of Ariel's songs with lots of emotion as we twirl around in the water holding hands. And as the song climaxes to an end, she puts her feet on my legs and pushes up and I raise her arms out like she's floating above water and we sing ... wandering free, wish I could be, part of that WORLD! and for half a second we both feel like we are beautiful mermaid princesses. That is one memory I want to have forever.

5 Comments:

Blogger Renee said...

I am so, so sorry that I am not more comfort to you while your man is gone! I wish life were normal around here so that you could come and stay with us. I hope Co-Co can help you get your mind off of him. Again, I'm sorry!!! Love, love, love you!

7:29 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

After talking to you on the phone and reading Spriteebee's blog and much prayer and wrestling....we decided on Konos. I start in two weeks! Call me then (Ellen can give you my #) or email me and I'll let you know what I think. We're even co-oping with two other families. I'm excited.

Hannah

8:55 AM

 
Blogger Kate said...

Awww so sweet. My heart felt so heavy for you when I was reading it. Before you know it he will be home. Just stay super busy! I loved your little story at the end. I have that song on my ipod (I love it that much!) Have a HAPPY day!

11:18 AM

 
Blogger Cantini #3 said...

I know it's hard. My man has been to Japan several times and it's hard being so far apart and not knowing what their doing and that you can't be with them. It made me appreciate him more!

6:49 PM

 
Blogger keri said...

but he's having such a good time! (i just read his blog)...yikes!! so sorry he's so far away. have fun wtih co co...tell her i said hi!! love you.

7:15 PM

 

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